Moving like music [entries|friends|calendar] .lauren. me&friends&myspace. Like love, move nice and slow. . . [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[Monday August 11th] Everytime I see Ronnie I still get a little shakey.. I no longer get those butterflies, but I do smile. Mainly because every time he sees me, I know he wants me. And now, he can't have me. I can tease him all I want and it drives him nuts because he can't have me now. I love smiling at him. Feeling him staring me when I'm working in Box. He's crazy... completely psychotic.. but I love playing along... As much I love him, I've finally realized that I'm not IN love with him anymore. I was just holding onto memories that were all fake to begin with anymore. We'll always have that connection though. Thats what will suck about it. I have these feelings growing more and more for Steven. I hate it. And he's pushing me to them. Calling me when he's drunk, telling me things when his guard is down. Telling me to come spend a week at his house. I'm trying to ignore these feelings with every ounce of my soul because I can't do this again. Ronnie completely broke me down. I haven't even built myself back up yet.... Sometimes I just get so sad... and then people get mad at me when they ask whats wrong and I say "nothing". They get mad because they know somethings wrong but I don't want to tell people that I don't have time to tell them whats wrong. Life is what's wrong with me. My parents. The way my two best friends act. How I've lost all my friends from High School. Everything with Ronnie.. he ruined my life completely.. There are a lot of things that I just sit and think about sometimes... and I just get so sad... [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Thursday August 7th] Claudia and Anna make me upset.... I love Ronnie... and I know our relationship is fucked up and dysfunctional.. but if we were truly not supposed to talk or see each other, wouldn't I just say no to him? Claudia was head over hills for Anna when they first met. And Anna used to treat her like SHIT and she cheated on her TWICE. Then magically Anna realized that she was in love with Claudia and they've been engaged for two years now. She acts like Anna was just perfect maiden, fair and sweet waiting for her. Ronnie is just like how Anna USED to be. Cheating, lying, not appreciating. I know he loves me. He knows he loves me. It just takes some people longer than others to get there act together. Look at David... if I would have held on for 4 more months I could have had him back and been happier than ever right now. He is completely sprung on me.... but I let go and the feelings were gone when he was trying to win me back... I'll never forgive my self for giving up... I guess thats why I left Ronnie treat me the way he does... he'll get his act together someday... I hope & I pray. [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

lol [Friday January 11th] my granmda is funny she called to wish me a happy birthday a little while ago & told me not to bring her any grand babies next year she also said not to drink too much tonight i told my dad that grandma gave me permission to drink but not too much lol wicked. [1] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Friday January 11th] Happy 18th birthday to me!! :] [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

STAR TREK!!!!! [Thursday November 15th] IN HD & ON THE BIG SCREEN WAS AWESOME!!!!! it looked soooo vibrant and just AWESOME!! im soo fucking glad my job got one of the special showings so I didnt have to pay for it lol & damn william shatner looked so sexy in hd colors Ronnie stopped being dumb I guess he came and picked me up all day first he took me to pico rivera, whitter, & then back to class and then tonight he came and got me so i could see the trek ..... & IT WAS AWESOME!!!! gah, im so excited I got to see it. peace&love [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Monday October 29th] this is SO for shannon i should be sleeping! gah! [2] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Thursday October 4th] I wish I could curl up into a little ball and just roll away away from my fears away from love away from life away from here. [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Tuesday August 21st] I'VE GOT A NEW NUMBER reply to this for my digits baby loves =]] [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

Just a reminder. [Tuesday August 7th] [1] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Friday June 29th] I'm contemplating whether or not I'm going to stretch my ears it wouldn't be a lot i only want a tiny hole but i'm not sure how it would look on me and all the same, i'm not really sure that I want it.. [1] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Sunday March 11th] more than a year ago this time i was depressed silly boys i think it made me a better person. xx [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Saturday January 27th] so i really wanna go see Walls of Jericho but i've been watching some live vids .... and im pretty much fuckin terrified of their crowds ...i'm a little too girly for that shit. xxo [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Tuesday January 16th] ok, so i'm a filthy liar lol this is my favorite and now im just waiting for the other pictures our ride pics are AMAZING lol xxo [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Thursday January 11th] Thank you to everyone who woke me up at 12 to tell me happy birthday yes i was sleeping but no i didnt mind Today should be a great day ♥ [3] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Monday December 25th] [ mood | content ] Momma loves her precious ♥ typing with one hand because he loves falling asleep between my arm and left boob i guess it's warm? lol merry christmas to me :) [2] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Sunday December 24th] Dear LJ friends Merry Xmas Eve especially to Trin & Lisa ♥ [3] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Wednesday December 13th] dreamsofXTC: have i told u this b4... if you had a dick... dreamsofXTC: ..id totally give you head fizzledwaters: Umm... yeah you have fizzledwaters: & umm... thnx? lol fizzledwaters: I mean like, wth do you even say to that? dreamsofXTC: u say..."damn aimee, id totally suck urs too" fizzledwaters: Lol, alright then, ditto dreamsofXTC: i bet yours would be real big dude.... fizzledwaters: Lol. Man, are you high?? **EDIT** it just occured to me that I should probably state that my sn= fizzledwaters lol okay. ♥ [2] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Tuesday December 12th] Chilly enough to wear a scarf yesterday It was wonderful <3 [0] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Friday December 8th] I've been playing this game on melodramtic called Legend of the Green Dragon it's so freakin hilarious something like pokemon and FF only not... of course not because i LOATHE FF games but yeah So i got killed in the forest and so i got sent to the graveyard cos im dead and so i gotta favors for this demon guy which is basically torment things and so i went looking for something to tormet and it usually says something like "insert name here" lunges at you with "insert item here" and such like that one of them was Devil in the blue dress lunges at you with alluring promises that made me laugh so hard i have no idea why im such a nerd. [3] hugged me | I like hugs.

[Thursday November 16th] SHANNON! I miss you :( I seriously do :( ♥ [2] hugged me | I like hugs.

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